Good news

Good grief, They've gone and changed the blogging interface, I can barely use the old one.

Mainly I wanted to post that the liver MRI came back clean, and now all that is left is to have the port removed, probably in a couple of weeks. It means anesthesia and a short one day trip to the surgery same-day care. Then I want to celebrate, and not just with a nice dinner out. Any suggestions?

Time for bed again, it is 3:30 am. Bumper sticker for the day:" Shin - Device for finding furniture in the dark."

I'm really tired of all this

I had my PET/CT on the 25th of April. I had a follow-up doctor appt. on May 9th, but on April 26th the oncologist called me and said I should come in ASAP, on the next day. Nothing to worry about. Just to check. So onc. dr checked an area near my mast. scar and said "no problem" BUT (don't you love the "but wait" there's more!) I have an area of concern in my liver. No real problem, we'll just get it checked out. So Sat the 5th I have an MRI of my abdomen, and a follow up appt on the 9th. I've only had one MRI and I still remember the panic-y claustrophobia of the small opening, and the sounds (like being in a metal garbage can and having someone beating on the outside with a 2 x 4).
And I forgot to mention that I have two steel screws in my right ankle, so maybe they won't do it after all???

My computer is slowly dying, one drive is not accessible any more, the video/graphics card says there is too little memory on it, and a new video card, with 1 Gb on it, the system doesn't recognize it even tho the drivers installed fine. There is a strange thumping noise when the computer is restarted. and all in all I think it is moribund. And soon to be mortal. So I have been doing a slew of back up of my files onto a thumb drive, and will be in the market for a new computer. Which I will have to install win XP on, since I don't do Windows (He he) 7. Or 8. Or Vista. I really am dreading this.

The photo at the top is from a blowhole in the ground where there is a big lava tube that is open on the back end as well as the front, right at the water line. So a big wave comes along, and it goes in the tube and whoosh!! the water is forced out the back side in a big spray, like a geyser. It was hard to take the photo at just the right moment, but such as it is, here it is. I've forgotten where this is, I could look it up but not at 6 in the morning. One of the Hawaiian islands.

I leave you with this bumper sticker: "||||////_ _ _ _ The domino effect at work."

Moving on

The above is a photo of my little 2002 Mazda Miata that we have up for sale. It is a neat little car and I will miss it, but 3 cars for 2 people is a waste. The Miata sits in the garage so much that the battery is constantly dead and must be jumped to start. So... up for sale. I bought it new, and drove it constantly when I worked, although it is awful in snow. At least 2 times I had to park it in the lot at the bank and call for N to come get me, I was doing doughnuts in the street. Anyway, I now flinch every time the phone rings in case they are calling about the car; I get all tongue-tied when I have to talk to strangers on the phone. Hopefully it will sell soon.

I'm still sorting through vacation photos; I've figured our how to capture a still photo from video clips, so that has been fun to mess with. The video program lacks a lot of features, but on the other hand, it is free.

Update: The miata sold yesterday. Sniff sniff. The new owner is older than me, but having a "midlife" crisis, I think.

Meanwhile, your bumper sticker: "Of course I can do it! The question is, do I want to?"

Maui

This a photo taken at the Maui Ocean Center. The main building hosted a 54 foot acrylic tunnel through which visitors could walk. It was so neat -- the fish were on both sides of the tunnel, and crossed one to the other by swimming overhead. It was the nearest thing to diving underwater that I'll ever have. At the top of the photo you can see the underside of a spotted eagle ray, and we could see his gills opening and closing. I found it hard to photograph because everything was constantly moving.
I highly recommend this center to any of you traveling to Hawaii. It isn't a showboat-y exhibit like s Sea World, but "a place of respect for the area marine life". We thoroughly enjoyed it. Oh yeah, and there are no cetaceans (whales and dolphins) they are prohibited from captivity by the County of Maui. All the other fish and critters are from the area of Maui.

Volcano National Park

This is a fumarole at Kilauea in Hawaii (big island) The fumes are real toxic and the park guide kept a close eye on the direction of the wind; if it had changed we would have had to scramble back on the bus and leave.





This lava field is what the ground looks like after the lava flow had ended. It was hard to walk on, the little ( a foot or two)lava tubes tended to break when you stepped on them. Can you see the little metal pipe in the lower left corner, going left to right? It's hard to see in this, but it is all that's left of the overlook center that was here.

The sights on this excursion were humbling; with all our technology, when a volcano erupts the response is the same as it was in pre-history - move out of the way, way out.

Bumper sticker for the day: "I'd love to help you but I've misplaced my magic wand"

This is known as the grand canyon of the pacific. Found in Waimea Canyon state park, it is on the western side of Kaua'i Island. It is 10 miles long and 3000' deep. When we were there it was very foggy, which only increased the impact of the site. The wind at the observation area was brutal, whipping cold air right through you. A "lazy wind" that can't be bothered to go around you. I regard this site as the most astonishing site on our trip.

Bumper sticker for the day: "I am an optimist, but I don't think it helps."

That tipsy bit? It's because of the waves...honest

This is me with our "complementary" bottle of (bad) champagne in our stateroom. The poor cabin steward had to fill and refill the ice bucket in which the champagne rested twice a day for the entire 2 weeks. And then we left it in the room (how do you pack champagne?)(And why would I want to?)

As you can see I am still fighting the battle of getting my haircolor back to the original shade of red. I have colored it 4 times with 4 different products and this orange is the closest so far. I'll take one more go and then it is the hairdresser. It must be some effect of the chemo, like the 'chemo curls' that I got in the lovely grey regrowth.

On a pleasanter note, I had my last chemo treatment last Wednesday. Now I have a scan scheduled for the 25th and a follow-up visit to the onco. and I will be good to go for 6 months. It has been a dark cloud on my horizon for over a year, but maybe this time all will be well. Fingers crossed.

Bumper sticker for the day: "Join the IRS (be audit you can be)"

back at last

We are back from our circle cruise to Hawaii, and I am beat. But for now, here is a lovely rainbow taken from our verandah. When we left San Diego at 5 pm, we got caught in a storm, according to the Captain, that was near hurricane strength, 65 mph winds and 30(!) foot seas. It was very hard to just stay in bed. At least one passenger broke her arm, and nearly everyone was sea sick. The next day the waves were a mere 20 ft high, and had to be seen to be believed. We found one benefit of chemotherapy is that I have really potent anti-nausea drugs, which I brought with me. Any time we started to feel queasy, we popped one, and our stomachs went back to sleep. The rest of the cruise was smooth, but overcast. The weather here at home was lovely, of course.

I will post more over the next few days.

Well usually March is a dreary time here with winter lingering on and on. That's why I picked this particular date for a trip to Hawaii. So of course yesterday was a balmy 65 degrees with sunshine and blue sky. Grrr. Nevertheless, we leave on Friday.

I always over pack for any trip, and with the cruise being 14 days long, it is a special temptation to just load up the suitcase. But I am restricting (or trying to)the heavy things like jeans (!) and instead pack capris. They should be lots lighter, right? Missing the whole lower part of the legs, right? Last time I went to FL to visit BFF, I used such a big suitcase I nearly couldn't get in the rental car, a Mustang. I had to wrestle it into the front seat, because I couldn't close the trunk lid. I'm trying do better. And laundry and dry cleaning on board is free...

I bought a Pandora bracelet last week; for those (like me) who had never heard of them until lately, this is the modern take on charm bracelets. I have the basic bracelet, but no beads on it. I figure it will be a good thing for birthdays and Christmas that the family can buy, they always complain I'm hard to shop for. I never had a charm bracelet back when I was a teenager and they were popular. My sister had a nice one and I was envious, although even then they were becoming passe. Probably these will too, but meanwhile I enjoy the plain bracelet. I'm not taking any of my expensive jewelry (not that I have much) because with my luck I'd drop it overboard. Or fall off, and me not notice until hours later.

The kids have been moaning (a little bit) about having to take care of the horses and inside cats, doing litter box duty every day, and so forth. This a rare chance for them to see how coming home from work doesn't equal dinner in 10 minutes. How much cereal can be eaten night after night? We will see...

Back to bed for me, I'm not sure what time it is, which clocks have been sprung forward. But the headache is gone, so I will doze for a while.

Bumper sticker for the day: "Get even. Live long enough to become a problem to your kids."

Wordless Wednesday

Depression

I didn't mean to let this space go blank for so long. My mammogram turned out fine, recheck in one year. I got our and the kids' taxes done, so that isn't hanging over my head. I have been sleeping a lot, probably due to the change in meds from the psych doctor. All the pets are currently OK (touch wood), the barn is clean, the laundry is done (for now) and the vacuum has been run (not terrific, but done). So why do I feel so down? Dunno.

The trip to Hawaii commences on March 16th, with the mammoth airplane ride to San Diego from Washington DC, non stop, about 6 hours real time. Overnight at the airport Radisson and then on to the ship on Saturday for the 14 day cruise. All the news about the cruise ship sinking, and now one having a fire in the engine room and having to be towed home, is not doing anything for my peace of mind. At least none of them are Holland America ships, which has an excellent record. So far.

We went to visit my uncle and put spring flowers on the family graves last weekend, always a melancholy task. My aunt and uncle are having health problems these days, and I flinch whenever the phone rings late at night, expecting bad news. Instead we get wrong numbers, and who calls after 11 pm, anyway? Not the phone etiquette I was taught.

Thank you, Dina, for reminding me to post. The days seem to just slip by, and weeks have passed before I know it. Hopefully I will have lots of photos to share when we get back from our trip. I am taking my macBook with us, but I think there is a pretty steep charge for internet access, so mainly it will be for camera-to-computer downloads. I have a minicam for video, never done that before, we will see if I too can come up with grainy out of focus shots that can't be deciphered, like I see on YouTube and so on. It will take still shots too.

Lunch time already and I am beastly thirsty, so bye for now.

Bumper sticker for the day: "If life gives you melons, you might be dyslexic."

Wordless Wednesday

The above two boxes were for my birthday last week. The one on the right is a music box, and the inserted photo on the lid is a Carol Grigg watercolor from a notecard. The one on the left, the round one, has an insert of pressed flowers, from an old letter. They were gifts from husband and son. Daughter R gave me a yummy candle, maple cream, it makes me hungry just to open the jar!

This is just a note here too, it has been so long since I posted. I had my "re-incision" and all is well. I finally got my hair back to its proper color (4 times dyed) but it is still extremely curly and I think it looks dumb, although everyone says they like it. I had it cut to at least give it some sort of shape, but it will be a while before I am brave enough to post a photo here. Mostly what I have been doing every day is napping. The psych doctor is changing some of my meds around and although I sleep better at night, I'm too sleepy during the day. I don't think we've got the mix just right.

The weather here has been very weird, the forecasters are calling this the year without a winter. We have had so much warm weather that the crocuses are up (tho not blooming yet) and the trees are in bud. On the first of February! This month is usually the one with the most snowfall, but with temps in the 40s and 50s every day, I don't think we will have anything but rain.

I'll leave you all with this bumper sticker : "Save the planet! It's the only place I can get chocolate!"

It's 2:30 in the morning! Go back to bed!

Or that's what I tell myself when I wake up, ready to go, in the wee hours of the morning. Myself seldom listens, so no changes there.

It is bitterly cold here, around 10 degrees, and an ice storm left everything coated in ice, so pretty. So awful to drive on. I hope it clears before the kids leave for work on Monday. We have noticed a big difference in the house with the new front and back doors. The wind no longer whistles through them and we don't have to put down a draft blocker at the threshold, so inadequate. And the furnace doesn't labor night and day to keep the temp in the 60s. Brrr. I'm feeling cold just writing about it.

The horses are all rugged up in their winter blankies, but still we won't let them out in the pasture until the footing is better. I really don't need (another) geriatric horse breaking a hip/front leg/stifle/knee by slipping on the ice. The barn may be boring, but they have toys and its a lot warmer and safer for them and the dogs.

The latest surgery is healing nicely, and I have only steri-strips that fall off after a while. Swelling all gone as is the pain. Next month is a mammogram on the survivor side, and then TA DA time for the Hawaii cruise in mid March. I need to do a final wardrobe check, make sure everything still fits. Nothing worse that hauling along clothes that can't be fastened up! Weight gain is the main side effect of the chemotherapy/immunotherapy I am getting, from what I read online. Why can't there be a drug with the side effect of appetite suppression? Well, whine whine it could be worse; I could be dead from the cancer.

It is now 3 am and I cm going back to bed, hopefully to sleep. I leave you with the bumper sticker of the day: "There are three kinds of people. Those who can count and those who can't."

Wordy Wednesday

I'm typing this at 3 am. I like to think of my nightly sleepy period as a result of a time-shifted siesta. That thought doesn't really work when I crash around 2:30 pm. Maybe I need two siestas?

I have (groan) begun walking on the treadmill. I am afraid that on our shore excursions I will poop out 5 minutes into it, and have to miss the whole thing. So far I can walk 5 minutes at speed setting one, and then I have to sit down. This is what comes from doing nothing strenuous for 5 years. Back when I was still working I could, and did, walk all over the medical center, but I let that level (not that it couldn't have been improved) slip away as I meandered around the house, or strolled through the grocery store. Why doesn't life work backwards, so you could start out with an activity at Olympic levels, and then gradually, slowly, get worse the more you practice? Sounds good to me.

A couple of days ago I drug out the heated water buckets for the horse stalls, and only found one, and that one had the rim chewed up (Maggie's work), and two buckets missing. I have a recollection of pitching one because Maybe (horse) kept chewing and pulling on it until it cracked top to bottom. But there still should be another. However, I am going to order two more ($35!!!each) and also a horse toy called a pas-a-fier for them to chew and crib on. Guess that makes me their enabler.
They've already chewed through one each, which is damned hard to do, these things are not flimsy:



But then, a thousand pound animal pulling on it with all their strength...

Bumper sticker for the day: "Thank you for not being perky."

Friday the 13th

I'm not superstitious about the 13th, and can't see why it should be even more inauspicious just because it falls on a Friday, can you? And the old saw about 7 years bad luck because you break a mirror -- I guess if you walk barefoot in your house, if it's like mine, it might take seven years to vacuum it all up. Some of my dust bunnies are pushing 20 about now. One cedar chest I recently looked under had an awful conglomerate of fuzz and dirt and cat toys; I resolve to not look under there again. And so goes most of the old adages, a grain of sense and a pound of nonsense.

I have been unwell over the last couple weeks, and so my blog has taken a hit when it's come to posting regularly. I can resolve to do better, but only when I feel better too. Meanwhile I'll put out these tiny posts just to let everyone I'm still alive and kicking.

T shirt for the day: "Christ died to wash away our sins -- let's don't disappoint him."

Happy New Year

Too tired to wait for the big silver ball to fall and what's with all the noise?

Comin' at you

I am moving slow tonight, this seroma removal has truly taken the starch out of my sails. I had to remove the dressing tonight, which I am sure the doctor would wish I hadn't; but the itching had me tearing at my skin nonstop. Now there is a rash, but small and sooth able with cortisone cream carefully applied above and below the incision. Somehow I had pictured an incision 2 or 3 inches long with lightweight sutures, and instead I have metal sutures on a large incision 6 inches long. And, may I add, ugly ugly ugly.

Thank you all for the words of encouragement throughout this endless process. It is funny how "here" friends disappear, and "far" friends hang in there. I don't know all of you who send me words of encouragement, but I thank each one of you for even the shortest comment. Should I ever be in your shoes I hope I will pass the hugs and kisses along.

Bumper sticker of the day: "All is not lost - but much is misplaced"